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Being able to build relationships with strangers is a critical part of networking in general.
Cold approaches are when you’re meeting someone you have no social connection with; unlike with a warm approach, you’re meeting a complete and total stranger without even the “friend-of-a-friend” buffer to ease your way. So here are some tough truths about making cold approaches: they can be difficult, especially if you’re trying to hook up that night.If you’ve just moved to a new city, you’re not necessarily going to have that network of friends and friends-of-friends to introduce you to the people they know.In addition, your social circle may not be all that large or well connected; not everybody’s group of friends is going to be populated by super social extroverts who know dozens and dozens of people for you to meet.Direct openers are exactly what it says on the tin: you’re being direct and upfront with someone about why you’re talking to them. It’s short, simple and establishes early on that you’re interested in her It can be polarizing – after all, you’re basically asking her to make a judgement right away as to whether she wants to talk to you – but it also means you find out very quickly whether or not she’s available, which means you spend less time on metaphorical dead-ends.These tend to be very simple: “Hi, I think you’re cool and I wanted to meet you. Personally, I’ve had the most success with “You seem like you’re cool… Speaking for myself, I prefer finding out early on whether or not someone I’m interested in dating or sleeping with is unavailable or uninterested; it means I’m not wasting my time trying to chase something that will never happen.I guess one of them hit on the other guy’s girlfriend or something because she’s on the street egging them on and shit?
Like she’s really getting off on two guys fighting over her.
It’s all about just starting a conversation and building from there.
Regardless of whether you go indirect or direct, you don’t want to linger on the opening; all you’re trying to do is get them interested in talking to you.
So one day his current girlfriend finds the box and just Hey guys, did you see the fight outside?
[Pause for reply ] So check this out, these two dudes come barreling out the front door.
Indirect openers tend to be either the classic “opinion” opener – where you are soliciting a third-party’s opinion about a matter – or a situational or observational opener.